thoughts

i sit
here and there
i sit and knit
stitch and stitch
loop and loop
yarn twist and turns

and the fabric grows
line by line
slowly
for a person
for a baby
for one who is also in the state of forming
cell by cell
as
i do stitch by stitch

and as i sit and knit
third sweater now
line by line
for a child who will live
three hours away from me
a certain energy, a certain memory i knit into each loop
into each stich
into each line
fo a child i will not know as intimately know as her father
so,
a certain sadness
with each stich
with each line
with each sweater that i knit

and a hope
that there will be a memory of me
for her

laptops...viruses...worms...and....

day'sdone
second workday of this week
a tuesday
and in ways, more like a monday
tomorrow, the michigan trip begins
another adventure....

meanwhile, here
laptop is infected
not enough protection
went to see the computer doc
not a good prognosis
will be a wipeout and reload
need to buy  a new works and new publisher for the website

frustration when i tried to go on-line with this laptop
dryer needs to be replaced
timer doesn't work
decision to be made
repair or replace
repaired once
time to replace
sigh

so, another adventure
and will see what the universe will provide
and
i get to show jason and kelly the sweet baby things
                       i have found and bought

the garden stands...

the garden stands this morning
   gently, slightly shrouded
        in mist

 colors somewhat muted
 colors somewhat subdued

daffies have had their peakand the tulips

have begun to wane

garden stands this morning
                                watching
                                waiting
                                being

cherry blossom snow

morning's grey
   waits for rain
garden's green
   waits for rain
as
  cherry blossoms fall

pink cherry blossom snow

and news from son and his wife
just back from songram of munchkin-to-be

 a girl child
 healthy and strong
 guess there will be more
     pink in my life

april's morning dance

two cardinals race around and through
   the garden
a game of tag?  
               of chase?
                of "this is my space and leave?
two red blurs zip here
                       zip there

thunder this morning
 line of storms moves through
 scattering rain here and there

a check on the seeds, planted a week or so ago
lettuce sprouted, quite dense and wild
peas have, within a day or so, popped up
radishes and onions can also be seen

daffies and tulips watch over the young uns
off to dance this day

sweet day of memories

day's done
long day
more time spent cleaning and picking up the home
than cooking the food!

a bit more clutter than i was happy with
between working and traveling to shows, well, "stuff" accumulates
and sits until it moves
or, more likely, i move it

the weather- oh my!
i went around opening windows, pushing up the storm windows
dropping the screens
switched out the glass panels from the front and back doors

i guess what's odd is coming from a family of "women" is to have such a perponderence of males....
sister deb, her daughter tasha and granddaughter cameron and myself are "the women"
i look at the pic, feel like a queen/matriarch surrounded by her subjects
odd place to be...

the sweaters!

at the richmond show, i wandered into a Miachaels store, purchased the cotton yarns for sweaters....two shows, several tuesday night stich n bitches at panera and now, they are done!

simple sweaters

zen meditation time

      and then, today, while at joann fabrics, this flannel said: make me into something!
bright colors, wonderful fun shapes.....playtime!

week's end

the reason why dylan went home with ice cream in his ears and between his fingers. such intense concentration on the experience of ice cream.......

do we remember the simple pleasures?

and when have we been content to leave the ice cream on our face?

middle of this 13th week

april 1st
fool's day?
or maybe a day to spend in the garden......

lettuce
planted 10 or so days ago has popped out of the seed,
now shows tiny first leaves
such a sense of excitement at the apperance

13th week of this year
we seem to think in terms of months and
days, and only of weeks as composed of days
to consciously think of 13th week out of 52 weeks
a reformatting of the brain
a reassesment of goals and desires

my younger son, jason, and his kelly are expecting
due september 1
their lives, this year, have been reformatted to thinking in terms of weeks

as for me, well,
this event has had subtle implications.
i wander through baby departments,
restraining myself,
because not until april 13th, we will know the gender of this munchkin...
still, it has been "safe" to purchase yellow and blue small outfits
that were simply too sweet to not take home.

and, i am knitting again.
have knit, off and on over the years...
interesting process
slow process
even makes handweaving look speedy.
 as i have sat knitting, hands moving from loops from  one needle to the other 
i find my "monkey mind" still and in a state of almost zen
aware of the movement
 yet not thinking of anything else

this process of manipulating yarn has, for some unknown reason,
become
very easily understandable and logical
i have already completed one sweater for this new munchkin
took what was to be a knitted swatch into a simple designed sweater.
am three quarters through a second one

as i work the yarn, i wonder how long these gaments will be worn by this human who
is not quite in this world yet.....
i think of spring 41 years ago, when i was pregnant with my first son
a may baby
of the hopes, fears and wonder of new life stirring within

how many weeks since then
how many months
and now,
 i will be a grandmother
interesting thought
interesting "defintition" of myself